26 Aug 2018

Category
Reflections
Find Your 5, Goals, Life Long Education

People Pleasing Could be Killing Your Chances

Hi Guys, It’s Mairead, the Founder and CEO here @ Spritz Mindset. I wanted to share with you my personal experience with people pleasing and what I have done to turn it around.

You might be one or you might work with one.

Doing anything to keep the peace. Agreeing with everything that is put to them but deep down they may not actually agree at all.

Before your boss even finishes saying what they are saying you are nodding your head saying “Yes”. Maybe it’s you, Or Maybe its someone you know, either way it’s frustrating.

I get this because I lived like this for a long time. Agree with my parents, which lead to me agreeing with my teachers, which then lead to agreeing with my partner and then one day I woke up and realised I had no opinion! Eek it wasn’t nice.

So I went about changing it.

I want you to ask yourself are you ready to start standing up for what you really want? Want to find your voice and start living your life?

‘The Collective’ CEO, Lisa Messenger, told HuffPost Australia

people pleasers are experts at self-sabotage

and we at Spritz Mindset would agree.

If you’re constantly trying to please others, no doubt you are holding yourself back as you’ll be perpetually self-sabotaging and putting yourself and your needs behind those of others.

Messenger said.

It’s imperative to gain a good sense of self, know what you stand for, know what your ‘not negotiables’ are and be able to stand true to those in an assertive, yet respectful, way.

Our advice would be to spend time working out who you are, what you stand for and what is your ‘why’ in life.

So here are 6 ways to start shifting from people pleaser to change maker:

1) Decide where you are going. Change makers know what they want and even though they may not know exactly how, their vision is crystal clear and they make sh*t happen.

2) Become a life-long learner. Knowledge is confidence. When you know, you know and if someone else has a different opinion, that is ok. You don’t have to have the same opinion but be sure that your facts are correct.

3) Believe in yourself. Believe is simply an idea that you have entertained and accepted as real. Decide today to accept that you can do whatever you put your mind to.

4) Stop comparing yourself to others. Own your uniqueness. Know that your skills and strengths are different on purpose. Celebrate and be proud of them.

5) Stand for something rather than fall for everything. Cultivate an opinion. Ask yourself – What is my opinion here? Give yourself the space to hear the answer from within and then go and voice it.

6) Surround yourself with people who are leading their life. Jim Rohn stated,

You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.

Surround yourself with people who are change makers and through osmosis you will sponge it up.

If this article was useful for you and you think others will benefit from reading it feel free to share.  You never know it might be exactly what someone needs to read today.

Keep being awesome,

Mairead
Founder | Lead Mindset Development Consultant

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